Saturday, February 22, 2014

Poetic Perspective (part 6) - Rock Bottom

I can’t pay rent// It’s already spent
On drugs and booze// It’s what I use// So I can stay oblivious and confused
My reality is my worst nightmare// People who I thought cared// Used me making me scarred and scared
To trust, to touch, to want company// Now I want to be alone and escape my misery
Smoke a joint when I awake, save the crack pipe for later// Try not to be hated

I fall asleep wherever I can// Until I feel a guard touching my hands
And shaking me away// That’s how I start my day// Each and Every day
I eat my meals in shelters, I gather food at Food Banks, Clothes from the Goodwill
My will is good/ My mind is ill
I sell my body to whoever needs to use it
Sometimes even for body heat
It’s cold out here and I’m freezing to death// I’m not sure why I haven’t been called to heaven yet
As my body ages, I start to lose teeth

I smell like urine, I haven’t bathed since forever// I don’t remember the date or time, but I do fear the cold weather
Socks with holes// Shoes with broken soles
Nothing to wear that will protect my feet// I wonder aimlessly at times, lost and brokenhearted on the streets// Hoping to get spare change so I can eat
I hit rock bottom, there is nowhere else for me

I lie silently on the streets hoping that no one I know recognizes me
Withering away silently, old, and diseased
If this is what it means to be free// Then someone save me ‘cause I am not free
Living in misery// In front of the world to see
I hit rock bottom// Now there’s very few options left for me.

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